Fear of having success…

March 13, 2019 0 By Angela

Being a matchmaker for as long as I have been, and speaking with thousands of people through the years, I have come to the conclusion that there are several different reasons why they stick with online dating as opposed to reaching out to a professional matchmaker.

For some people, it is simply a matter of living in a fantasy world. Anyone can fill out a profile online, so there are thousands of members and plenty of profiles to look at. About 11% of American adults have used an online site or a mobile dating app. With this many profiles to go through, it gives people false hope when they see so many people that they would consider dating. I just interviewed a gentleman that showed me at least 30 pictures of women that he saw online that he was interested in. When I asked him how many of them had he met and or dated, he said “well none, I am waiting on a response from them” This gentleman admitted that he typed an email showing interest and then copied and pasted it to every woman that he had found attractive. I won’t even start on the fact that he admittedly went on looks alone without even opening up their profile and reading what they had to say. Sadly enough one-third of people that have used online have never actually gone on a date but because they are going through profiles, sending and receiving messages, they feel as if their social life is booming. I had asked him if the type of ladies he was showing to me were people that he could attract on his own. “Of course,” he said even though not one of the women that he had messaged had shown interest in return. A potential client like this one never makes it through the interview process or finds himself in my database. I will only work with people that are realistic and serious about meeting quality singles. If someone is living in a fantasy world with their expectations, they are not only setting themselves up for failer but myself as well.

For others, it is simply cost that keeps them fishing in the same pond. What most people don’t understand is, even though matchmakers don’t have a product that they put a barcode on and place it on the shelf for sale, our overhead is not cheap. I do extensive marketing and recruiting to ensure that my clients have success. For some people, a person’s personal life strangely seems to be the one area that they do not see the need for investing in. The other thing that people don’t look at is the cost of paying numerous monthly subscriptions over years of using online services often add up to more than the fee of using a relationship specialist in the first place, not to mention the money that they spend with dating the wrong people. Here at Nebraska Expert Matchmakers, I have a program to fit everyone’s needs and financial situation.

Lastly, for some people, using a relationship specialist is just too real. Coming in and speaking with a matchmaker, discussing your relationship history, your dreams, preferences, wants and needs can be scary for some people. A lot of things that we discuss or questions that you are asked, makes you think a little too much about why you have not had the success you desire. You may have a fear of failing and not doing so behind the privacy of your computer screen. For some people, it’s easier to blame someone else rather than looking at something you may need to adjust in their approach to dating. Having the support and experience of a matchmaker working on your behalf keeps you motivated and provides you with a confidant to rely on to help you through the process.

If you have been trying different things on your own, and you find yourself no closer to your relationship goal than you were a few months ago, let’s meet and discuss how I can help you.